Losing a family member or friend often means you’ll need to take time off from work to attend the funeral and process the loss. But how do you go about requesting that time off?
Asking for time off for a funeral is called bereavement leave. Bereavement leave is employer-sanctioned time off after the death of a loved one. Although employers' bereavement policies vary, you can write a bereavement leave letter explaining the situation and how much time off you’ll need.
Understanding Bereavement Leave
As humans, we’re entitled to our emotional well-being. Bereavement time is necessary to heal wounds caused by the passing of loved ones. Let’s discuss some things to note before asking for bereavement leave.
Q: What is bereavement leave?
A: Bereavement leave is employer-sanctioned time off granted after the death of a loved one. It allows employees to attend a funeral, handle related obligations, and take time to process their loss.
Bereavement leave policies vary widely by employer. Some organizations offer paid leave, others offer unpaid leave, and some address bereavement on a case-by-case basis.
In many situations, employees are expected to submit a bereavement leave request explaining the situation and how much time off they need.
Q: Is paid bereavement leave required by law?
A: There are no federal laws in the United States that require employers to provide paid bereavement leave unless it is specified in an employee’s contract.
The Fair Labor Standards Act does not require payment for time not worked, including time off to attend a funeral. However, some states — including California, Illinois, Maryland, Oregon, and Washington — do require many employers to grant bereavement leave.
Even where it isn’t legally required, most employers choose to offer paid bereavement leave. According to a 2024 Society for Human Resources Management report, 91% of businesses offer paid bereavement leave, though eligibility often depends on factors like employment status and length of service.
What to Consider Before Requesting Bereavement Leave
Q: How do I find out my employer’s bereavement leave policy?
A: Start by reviewing your employee handbook or internal HR documentation. While many types of absences, such as sick leave, are commonly approved, paid bereavement leave is not universally offered.
If your organization does allow bereavement leave, understanding the rules in advance helps you avoid unnecessary back-and-forth and allows you to tailor your request to align with company expectations.
If the policy is strict, adjusting how you frame your request may improve the likelihood of approval.
Q: Will I need to provide proof of the death?
A: Possibly. Some employers require documentation, such as an obituary or funeral notice, before approving bereavement leave.
While this can feel intrusive, organizations may ask for evidence to prevent misuse of bereavement policies.
In some cases, employers may also ask about your relationship to the deceased, particularly if their policy limits bereavement leave to immediate family members.
Q: Does timing at work affect whether my request is approved?
A: Yes. Workload and seasonal demands can play a role. Some industries experience predictable busy periods — such as accountants during tax season — when approving time off may be more difficult.
Being aware of your organization’s current workload can help you approach the request realistically and understand how your absence may affect your team.
Q: Should I weigh personal priorities before requesting bereavement leave?
A: Yes. While attending a funeral and grieving a loved one is deeply important, practical considerations also matter.
Funerals often involve short-notice travel, which can be expensive, especially if the service is held far away or overseas. At the same time, missing work during a critical period could affect professional responsibilities, projects, or opportunities.
Taking time to reflect on your personal, financial, and professional situation can help you decide how much leave to request and how to approach the conversation with your employer.
Q: What is the general process for asking for time off for a funeral?
A: While policies differ, the process typically follows a similar sequence: notifying your employer, discussing the situation, determining how much time you need, and submitting a written request.
Q: When should I notify my employer about bereavement leave?
A: As soon as possible. Even though work may be the last thing on your mind, early notification allows your employer to plan for your absence and reduces stress later.
At first, you may not know exact dates or how much time you’ll need — and that’s understandable. Death is often unexpected, and post-death responsibilities can be unpredictable.
As long as you keep your employer informed as details become clearer, this usually isn’t a problem.
Q: Is it better to request bereavement leave by phone or email?
A: A phone call is usually best, especially at the outset. While email or text may feel easier, a brief conversation helps clarify expectations and avoid misunderstandings.
You can keep the call short and factual. For example:
“Hi, [Name]. My [loved one] has passed away, and I’ll need to request bereavement leave. Can you let me know what steps I need to take?”
Next, follow up your call with a written request. Your manager or HR contact can then explain what’s required to move forward.
Q: How do I decide how much time off to request?
A: After the initial conversation, you’ll need to determine the length of your leave. This includes time to attend the funeral and manage personal and family responsibilities.
If your employer offers generous paid leave, you may choose to take additional time to recover emotionally.
Regardless, it’s important to outline a clear timeline so your employer can plan coverage and your return to work.
Q: Why do I need to submit a written bereavement leave request?
A: A written request creates a clear record for both you and your employer. Even if you’ve already spoken by phone, submitting a formal email or letter helps ensure your request doesn’t get overlooked.
Your written request should be professional and concise. It typically includes:
The name of the deceased and your relationship to them.
The date of passing.
The amount of leave requested.
Your expected return date.
Whether you plan to use vacation time.
Coverage arrangements during your absence.
Your availability, if any, while away.
A brief expression of appreciation.
Templates for Bereavement Leave Requests
Writing a coherent bereavement leave request is a difficult task as you’re cherishing the memory of your loved one. For this reason, I have included ten examples to make these hard times easier for you.
Feel free to modify any of these templates to your liking, or take them word for word, it’s up to you. I want to make your life as easy as possible when dealing with the loss of a loved one.
Here are 10 examples of bereavement leave requests:
Example 1: In-Depth Formal Request
Dear [Manager],
I am writing to formally request bereavement leave. My grandfather, John Smith, passed away last night in [location]. I am requesting bereavement leave to return to [location] and make funeral arrangements from Oct. 1 through Oct. 9. I won’t need additional time off as paid vacation time.
Despite the unfortunate circumstances, I remain committed to this organization and my position. I will do my best to complete the projects I’m working on before my bereavement leave. Mike Jones has agreed to handle my usual obligations during my absence. If you need to reach me while I’m away, please send an email to [your personal email] or text my cell phone at [your cell phone number].
I truly appreciate your understanding during these difficult times.
Kind regards,
[Your name]
Example 2: In the Middle of a Project
Dear [Manager],
I do understand this is an inconvenient time for me to take off work since we’re in the middle of a project, but [describe the situation], so I need to request [amount of time off] for bereavement leave.
Please let me know if this is acceptable. If you approve my request, I will be available through phone and email for [amount of time off] to help our team adjust to my absence in any way I can.
Thank you,
[Your name]
Example 3: Short and Formal in a Large Organization
Dear [Manager]
I’m emailing you to let you know [name of the person who passed away, your relationship with them, and any other relevant details]. I’m requesting [amount of time off] for bereavement leave.
According to our company’s policies, this should be acceptable, but please tell me if there are any issues or if I need to take any additional steps before you finalize the approval.
Kind regards,
[Your name]
Example 4: Short Funeral Leave Request to HR
Dear [HR Supervisor],
I am writing to formally request a short leave of absence to attend my mother’s funeral next week.
I understand our company allows employees to take some time off in case of such emergencies, and I’d like to make use of that privilege now. Thank you in advance, and please let me know if I need to provide any additional details.
Best,
[Your name]
Example 5: Immediate Absence Bereavement Request
Dear [Manager],
I regret to inform you that my mother passed away today, tragically and without notice. Because of these circumstances, I respectfully request that you grant me 5 days of paid leave and 2 days of unpaid leave beginning today.
I am heading home today, June 30, and will be out of town for the funeral and other arrangements until July 9. So I will be back in the office on July 11. I would appreciate your concern in this matter, as I need time to take care of my family.
In case you need to reach me, please leave me a message on my number. You can also reach me at [cell phone number].
Thank you for your consideration.
Yours sincerely,
[Your name]
Example 6: Paid Leave Bereavement Leave Request
Dear [Manager],
I am writing to inform you that [name of loved one and relationship to you] has passed away.
I would like to formally request three days of paid leave to travel to [location], arrange funeral plans, and spend time with my family. Beyond that, I would like to use any unused paid vacation time I have accrued to navigate these troubling times with my family. I am deeply committed to my work at [company name], and I trust you understand.
I will be available via email during this time. For urgent matters, I have notified [colleague or supervisor] of my absence, and he is happy to help out in my absence.
Thank you in advance for understanding.
Best,
[Your name]
Example 7: Unsure of Company Policy
Dear [Manager],
My father passed away last night. Please let me know how much bereavement leave I can take for the funeral and to get his affairs in order.
As you know, I am very committed to my job at [company] and would not ordinarily ask for time off without notice. However, I’m hoping you will be willing to work with me as I grieve the loss of my father. What options are available, and what do I need to submit?
Kind regards,
[Your name]
Example 8: Friend or Non-Immediate Relative
Dear [Manager],
My cousin, who was my closest friend since childhood, died last night unexpectedly. I know this loss doesn’t fall under our official bereavement policy guidelines, but I desperately need some time to come to terms with this. I am hoping you can understand this situation.
I’m devastated and need to be with family at this time. If you approve my bereavement request, I plan to take an absence from [dates you will be gone].
Thank you in advance for working with me.
Best,
[Your name]
Example 9: Short and Specific
Dear [Manager],
I am writing to request a three-day leave to attend the funeral of my paternal uncle. The service will take place in San Francisco on Monday, July 8. I would be away from work beginning that day and return to the office on July 11.
Thank you,
[Your name]
Example 10: Long and Specific
Dear [Manager],
My father, John Smith, passed away on Wednesday night. The visitation and funeral services will take place on Thursday and Friday in Chicago next week. According to the company’s bereavement policy, I have three days of paid leave I can use to attend my father’s funeral.
In addition, I talked with Joe Dunn, my direct supervisor, and he has approved the use of additional vacation days. This will allow me to travel to my mother’s home in advance and spend time with my family during these challenging times.
Thanks to the bereavement leave and vacation days I have available, I can spend today finishing up a few last-minute tasks I need to complete before I go. My time away starts tomorrow, July 2. I will return to work July 14.
I understand how busy the office has been recently, so I want to ensure everything runs smoothly while I’m away. [Co-workers] have agreed to cover my workload over the next week, so my absence won’t affect our team or our clients.
If you have any questions for me, please reach me via cell phone at [cell phone number] or email at [email].
Sincerely,
[Your name]
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